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Thursday 10 May 2012

Serious i am almost at a breaking point



Some people just don't understand or know when to stop... Their point of view of how my life is now is totally different..as if they never tried to understand me... I am done being good..being nice! i sacrificed everything for them, all they know is complaining about stuff.. When i tried putting myself or trying to be on their side of the story, they laughed or even underestimated me.. i hate that. I spent 5 years of my life motivating people... but what i got was unbearable.. i am just human lah! I have my own savings... i saved for me and me alone... but, when some people are in need of my money..i dont hesitate to just lend or even give the money.. i seriously dont care... but when i am at a point where i really a certain amount of cash.. they just felt as if i am the only one who uses their money... its like i have to beg for it.. i am truly pissed of okay... i tried explaining my situation.. but they just wont listen... i will never ask for something i dont need... i will never tend to make other people suffer because of me.. and that is why i rather sacrifice my time for the benefits of other.. and what did i get back in return?

Seriously.. i promised my self before.. that i'll study hard and get a better job in the future.. by that time.. i will never disturb anyone or burdened anyone.. thats a promise i tend to keep...

my future fiance is a nice guy.. i am not saying this because he's my future husband , i am saying this because thats a fact... despite of what some people thought of him ..claiming that he's not husband material yet, he cant afford to give the happiness i am suppose to get... he cant give the life i have now and etc... i can be sure that all of the above statements are wrong.. i am happy and thankful that Allah gave me a chance to be a whole new person.. and Allah gave me him to guide me to be better... thanks Khairul Anuar.. you are always there when i need moral support.. you helped and guide me to be a better person and have faith in me.. i am always thankful to know that i will be engaged to you soon... and i hope we'll tie the knot soon... never change.. promise that you'll stay this way forever... even if i am not meant for you... i know you are the best person i know..you have the patience like no one i ever knew before.. you have a big heart.. you are wise ...

i dont hate you guys.. i love you guys ...a lot.. but stop treating me like im an idiot... stop assuming me that i know nothing... i am not stupid.. i am not saying that i am always right.. im just human.. i make mistakes too... but, i listen....and i learn by listening.. unlike you guys... you all are just in your own tiny world ... happily believe that you know everything.. correction.. ONLY ALLAH KNOWS EVERYTHING..AND I MEAN EVERY SINGLE DETAIL IN LIFE...so stop acting like god and start to learn about life... make mistakes.. learn from it... put ur self in other people's shoes and feel how its like to be treated like an idiot.. to be treated like you dont own anything... work... earn your own money.. thats one of the way for you to learn more about life... live your own life like you are responsible to do everything just on your own and you alone... respect everyone around you, and everyone around you will respect you too.. i know my place... you with all your branded and high living will get you nowhere..because in the end... you'll be 6 feet under with nothing around you...

i dont mean to make you guys look bad.. but its clear now that you guys are just a team of de-motivated people.. every single one of you...