i tried to play my role..but i feel so unneeded

Assalamualaikum... sedih memang sedih. aku cuba sedaya upaya aku untuk puaskan hati semua orang... tapi tak de sape yg menghargai aku...sometimes i felt like giving up...buang masa je buat baik... ingat kita pun tak...memang aku sedih... bila susah baru cari...

thats why i prefer to be at unisel.. lepak kat cni lagi best...tp kena balik gak and face reality.. i was trained to be a motivator since i was very young... i've been to many schools ...shared my knowledge to those who are lack of confidence and need inspiration and stuff.. etc... but how can i motivate myself trying to accept the fact i am always the type of person needed in desperate times... no more...

I just cant reconcile my mind for the time being...my desperate urge to be perfect will never have a proper solution....social pressure about my love life... i am only human... i went to periods of insanely focusing on my degree, periods of total inaction..spent my whole life here dealing with assignments ,reports ..coping with life during wild storms....

All i know for now... i started an engineering course since i was 16... sometimes i wonder why i studied engineering in the first place...

maybe i am meant to be with outsiders.. i feel more loved...